9 May 2013

Subject 13 #18 - Commentary

Quick one today.  As always, please read the issue first.

The cleaning of Nasty was a chance for me to let her deal with her thoughts and find out how much time has passed.  Nasty considers being someone else; a fresh start, so to speak.  Naturally, and this was because I needed an action sequence where Nasty hit someone, there's a robbery.  Nasty stopped the robber without her powers.  I might have a running theme for the series; "You don't need powers to be a hero."  If someone needs to step up, Nasty's there.  She may bitch and complain every step of the way, but she'll do what she can.  Doesn't mean she won't be wrong in some cases.

Meanwhile, the Consortium has sent three people after Nasty - Christopher, Lashawna, and John.  Adam and Karen are the agents Nasty fought as she escaped.  The three agents being sent are prepared for a ahem nasty fight.

And Nasty's final final decision is to stay and be Peregrine.  Probably telegraphed since Issue 16.  I did, briefly, consider keeping Nasty on the run, but other plot lines came to mind and the drawbacks of Nasty being a fugitive popped up.  The big drawback is that she'd have to find a way to get from town to town without hitchhiking.  She ditched Karen's van, expecting it to have been reported stolen.

Tomorrow, Issue 19, the new Peregrine debuts.  (No one would have expected Nasty to be a debutante.)
Saturday, Part IV of my adapting games series at FanToPro.  This time, adapting games as games.
Coming soon, more NaNoWriMo prep work, more Traveller, and more!
During the Victoria Day long weekend, May 17-19, I will be at CanGames, where I will be running two slots worth of Fluxx Saturday morning and afternoon.


  1. I don't think the acceptance was necessarily telegraphed. It seemed overwhelmingly likely that Jess would end up with the group in some capacity, but not necessarily as a sidekick, not right away - particularly when we know so little about the job. When SHE knows so little about it. I grant she's impulsive, but for all she knows, this might be an offshoot of the same group that captured her... she was still wondering what was real and what wasn't mere HOURS ago. The knife attack itself also feels a bit convenient, happening less than half a day from the offer - almost like it was a setup? Hmmm.

    The loss of a month seems a bit overly dramatic too. It was only a week in terms of her mental clock - and even if we want to accept that time was running slower with #4 in her head, we can't, because otherwise Maria's plotline would have experienced two weeks, and it didn't, it was mere days. Or had Nasty been shifted to storage after that wrapped up or something?

    Granted, it's kind of unfair to pick apart something that you were only doing in passing as a form of stress relief at work... but then, you did put it online. ;) By the by, you do have a good sense of the format for when you were writing there, as you mentioned last time. It's good when you can pick up on your own style.

    Oh, one other thing - was Nasty running full tilt after a perpetrator without wearing a bra? ... Hypothesizing that either she's rather flat chested, or she was wearing a very tight sweater, or she's going to be feeling that later.

    Oh, one last idea - you might want to put your "Coming Soon" at the TOP of the post, before the "DON'T READ ON UNTIL" warning. Otherwise, well, people won't read on to see it.

    1. As far as Nasty knows, she's away from her captors. She doesn't seem to grasp recursive levels of paranoia. There's also the element that the Foundation is helping her without strings attached. She could have left, which would turn the series into a "fugitive on the road" narrative like the old Incredible Hulk TV series.

      Of course, I could have had both characters on separate timelines without telling anyone, but that'd be confusing. :) What the Consortium was doing was keeping Nasty under except for when it came time to train. There, #4 could use tricks to speed up and slow down time for her. All of Nasty's plans, mainly meeting Eric to go over her essay, were long lost, and teens are good at being overly dramatic.

      I did put it online for feedback, good or ill. :) And at this point, the story went beyond just stress relief to a more proper story. There were times when I got worried about length, as in issues being too short. That got fixed later.

      She's going to be feeling that later. Nasty doesn't have the traditional bust of a superheroine, but she's not completely flat, either.

      I should, but I'm hoping people read the full post. :)