10 May 2018

Mecha Academy Episode 2 Chapter 2 Commentary

A relaxing day out, in "By Your Leave" Chapter 2.

I should never have split the party.  I've been a games master.  I know the risks.  But Dusty didn't want to intrude on Rhiannon or the others, so she stayed behind and was ordered to go have fun.  So, off went the rest.  Dusty was happy just staying behind reading.  But reading isn't very exciting to read about.  I could just have the audience read what she was reading.  Dusty gets a quiet day, something that lets her relax and indulge herself, something she hasn't done in a few years.  Why get upset over the haircut?  Because she wasn't ready for the huge change in appearance.  Dusty has baggage that she needs to get past.

Over in Vaughan's Landing, it's a busy morning.  Lars' family have a working farm and while mechanization allows for farmers to reduce the amount of labour, there's still work to be done.  Lars is used to getting up early.  Ric, Rhiannon, and Miyami are getting there, but are enjoying a day off.  Being guests, they're not expected to help out.  They'd be in the way, anyway.  The large breakfast is traditional; it helps with energy throughout the day.

Susanna is going to be a pain in this arc.  She tagged along.  It made sense that she'd tag along.  She's determined to be with Lars.  What do I do with her?  Thanks to Susanna, I was able to work in some of Lars' backstory.  Lars doesn't have much excitement, not compared to Rhiannon and Dusty.  What Lars has is a background that isn't much different from today's young adults, especially those from a farming community.  Even in the far future, some things are consistant.  The Landers were mentioned before; now it's time to meet one of them.  Vesta went to school with Lars.  Vesta went to the prom with Lars.  Somehow, Lars picked up a bit of what I had planned for Ric, a ladies man.  Except, Lars isn't doing anything.  Susanna and Vesta just went to him.

There's a bit of Miyami revealed, too.  She's from a city on a more populated world, one that may have to import foodstuffs to supplement what can be grown locally.  Miyami also prefers technology, so the great outdoors isn't that great for her.  But, she's trying.  Rhiannon's giving it a shot, so Miyami should, too.

Splitting the group up lets the different pairs do what they want.  Most of that was left off-screen for the audience to fill in, with just hints of what happened.  Ric and Abby went on rides and won prizes.  Rhiannon and Miyami did the same, though in a different manner.  Lars and Susanna went to see baby animals and found a cozy place alone.  The idea was that they were off together but separate having a fun time, a contrast to Dusty's solo outing.

I am treading the line on a problematic trope in science fiction, the excessive use of a modifier.  MST3K showed the problem during their riffing of Manhunt in Space; the short version is, adding a modifier in front of normal words and phrases is annoying and doesn't add to the setting or the story.  Sure, space ships and space stations are acceptable, but space diners and space fairs just make no sense.  I'm coming close to that line with the grav Ferris wheel.  It's colour, but it doesn't really hold up under scrutiny.  How does a grav Ferris wheel work?  Well, quite well when properly maintained, but that's not the point.  It's a throwaway line, or was meant to be one.  It could still get involved in a scene.  Fortunately, I don't push the anti-grav technology too much.  A maglev passenger train?  That's a possibility today.  Maglev Ferris wheels?  Maybe a maglev roller coaster, which I wish I thought of when I was writing the chapter.

Friday, Mecha Academy, "By Your Leave" Chapter 3, "Crime Stoppers".
Also Friday, over at Psycho Drive-In, The Almighty Thor.
Saturday, over at The Seventh Sanctum, /The Mummy/ (1999).

No comments:

Post a Comment