12 Sep 2013

Lethal Ladies #6 - Commentary

The first scene lets the elder Ladies discuss what happened and allowed me to emphasize that they aren't as young as they used to be.  Rose and Elena have made references to cities in the early 80s, placing them in their mid-40s as of the scene's time stamp.  The little details - not as energetic, the odd noises bodies make after being in one position too long - should help show their age without having to state it outright.  Variable schedules are hard on a body, too.  Having worked late shifts*, adjusting on days off to everyone else's normal day was difficult.  A one-shot late night or overnight is tough and I do need to sleep afterwards to recover.  Thus, Rose needing her sleep after the meeting.  Elena, on the other hand, is planning to stay up according to her regular schedule, slipping in a nap before the meeting.

The second scene adds a complication to the plot.  The FBI is involved.  I managed to refrain from shouting out to Die Hard with Special Agent Johnson and Special Agent Johnson, going with Thompson instead.  And, yes, Special Agent is the title agents use.  The agent allowed me to snark at myself over choosing Elena's surname; at least she can pronounce it.  The risk of scouring hockey rosters for appropriate last names.  The Miranda rights were found on the web, though I've lost the specific site.  The charges are serious and are under the FBI's mandate.

The third scene starts near the intersection of Arsenal and Hampton.  I chose that location for a reason, but I can't remember why.  Possibly because there is no FBI or police building near there.  Allison doesn't take being locked up well; neither does Amber, though the latter has an overactive imagination.  Rose once again gets to be the mother and separates the two.

Elena gives Rose a cryptic hint about how to escape, though Rome 1982 is coming up.  Rose tries to slip through, but Allison is far more limber, and there's a hint on what she does Thursday nights.  A classic ruse follows, though Elena is a method actress.  When a prisoner turns blue, something is wrong.  Rollins gets to be the unlucky agent to fall for the ruse.  It's a classic for a reason; if a guard is wrong about the ruse beign a ruse, a prisoner is dead and he has questions and paperwork to deal with.  Paperwork is never pleasant.  So, the guard has to check.

The last scene is at 1633 Bond Street in East St. Louis, across the river and state line from St. Louis, Missouri.  The Street View of the address shows that the lot is undeveloped.  I picked the address based on a satellite view in 2006 and saw a low density residential area.  A quick check at Wikipedia showed a high crime rate and urban blight, where abandoned buildings could be bought cheaply.  Perfect for a bolt hole.

The story was meant to be the first of several, so I needed a scene to get the characters to discover each other's secrets.  Rose and Elena have already hinted at events in their shared past.  Amber makes the Pinkie Pie-style leap in logic and gets the right answer.  I needed to show that Amber wasn't just a caffeine junkie who spouted pop culture catch phrases.  She's observant and has studied.  Amber just doesn't act like it.  And while discussing Amber, she would definitely be a My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic fan.  She'd even paint her car the colour of her favourite pony, Apple Bloom.  Fortunately for Allison, Apple Bloom doesn't have a cutie mark, so Amber can't add it to anything she owns or uses, like computer equipment Allison maintains or a company car.

Tomorrow, find out what did happen in Rome in 1982.
Saturday, at MuseHack, the September link roundup of news about remakes and adaptations.
Coming soon, a sneak peek at a preliminary work and narrowing down the projects for November.


* 5pm to 2am, at two different jobs.  The second one also had a one to one-and-a-half hour commute, turning into a two hour commute on the way home because buses weren't running.

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