11 Apr 2019

The Elf's Prisoner - Commentary 24

Miscues and misbehaviour, in The Elf's Prisoner Chapter 24.

This was Kazimier's chapter.  Part of the reason for focusing on him was to get used to writing from a male perspective.  If you take a look over at the list of works, most of the stories feature a lead woman, particularly the solo leads in Subject 13, Tales of the Soul Blade, and The Devil You Know.  This was a chance to get inside Kazi's head for a bit and to make sure Jyslyn and Nyssa didn't take over the narrative too much.

The first part of the chapter let me show how divine spells worked.  Instead of having to study individual spells like a wizard would, priests pray.  Whether the priest gets the desired spell depends on the deity.  What the spell looks like, its special effect, also depends on the deity.  Kazi is a priest of the Lightbringer; the spells he uses must involved light in some way, whether a soft glow while healing or a wisp of light as a messenger.  Since I don't have many deities fleshed out yet for the story, I'll use examples from the Forgotten Realms.  Auril, the Frostmaiden, if she were in my setting, would use snow and cold as special effects for spells, with healing involving a touch so cold it burns and messages sent through snowfall even in summer.  Bhaal, the Lord of Murder, may not even grant healing spells and messages would be sent via blood.  I wanted to show a difference between the arcane and the divine.

That just leaves the blatant fan service.  A clash of cultures.  A very awkward moment.  Part of the plan for the story is to get Kazi and Jyslyn together by the end.  What happened in the room, though, is more of a setback.  They're still learning about each other.  Jyslyn has some baggage that she needs to deal with.  Kazi isn't looking for a quick roll in the hay.  One of the goals in the back of my head while writing this was to show them growing together.  At the same time, I don't want it to be too fast.  They need something more than saving each other's life to build on.

Wren was a great way to leave some unsaid tension between Kazi and Jyslyn.  Drunk Wren is even better when it comes to awkwardness.  Some of her mannerisms are based on me, though not directly.  The veering away from the straight line?  That.  After a more horrible than normal day working at an ISP that will remain nameless for now, when word came down from on high that techs would have to upsell crap, I poured myself a rye and Coke - it was the only mixer I had in the apartment - with 2.5 to 3 fingers of alcohol in a lowball glass.  I probably should've been eating something, too, but I may have been going out later to do just that.  I only had the one drink, and it was a rare thing for me to do.

Friday, missives and misery, in The Elf's Prisoner Chapter 25.
Also Friday, over at Psycho Drive-In, Titans.
Saturday, over at The Seventh Sanctum, Godzilla: Planet of Monsters.

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