9 Mar 2017

The Soul Blade Chapter 23 - Commentary

Tricia gets another skeleton, in The Soul Blade Chapter 23.

Tricia`s murder is the second one I ever wrote, and the first one that lingered.  The surfer on the beach didn`t get the loving detail.  This time around, though, I wanted to show Tricia using the rituals Summer discovered, now that I knew what they were.  Tricia`s concerns aren't so much about being seen as they are about her clothes.  Blood just stains so.  Tricia may be the most evil character I've dealt with during NaNo, including the evil version of Nasty in Crossover and Caitlin in Unruly.

While I have had antagonists who are out for power, Tricia is the most obvious about it.  Caitlin has to work with others, so she must keep her desire for power masked.  The villain in By the Numbers is trying to carve out his own niche, and doesn't want widespread disaster marring his domain.  My 2015 NaNo project, The Elf's Prisoner, has a villain softening up the surface world for an invasion, but hasn't made the work personal.  Tricia is revelling in being superior and taking lives. 

There were some minor edits in the scene with Amy, mostly to change Brenna's attitude a little.  I can still see where she's resentful of her father's new girlfriend, but I also am well aware of what each of Brenna's movements originally meant.  Amy is trying to be friendly, looking for a way to connect with her new boyfriend's family.  I think Brenna's shyness, though she's been working on it, helps with the rewrite.  However, it's the reader who makes the final determination here.  Is Brenna just flustered or is she being resentful?

Friday, Brenna and Matt have dinner, in The Soul Blade Chapter 24.
Also Friday, over at Psycho Drive-In, Mercury Theatre's War of the Worlds.
Saturday, over at The Seventh Sanctum, localizations.

1 comment:

  1. I don't think Brenna's being resentful. But then, I don't think she's being flustered either... it's more like she's moody. Perhaps lacking direction, wishing she could cling to the past? Maybe some of that is the earlier vibe from Grace's insecurities; the scene with Amy is pretty short. Also, that's just my opinion.

    Regarding evil: Caitlin is also (in effect) a protagonist (maybe "anti hero"), so (a bit like Carrie or Julie in my story), she has to have her "evil" inclinations tempered. Otherwise the audience won't root for her. Likewise for Nasty's mirror, who doesn't need audience sympathy, but does need to reflect a more violent protagonist - and can someone who likes pink be all bad? :D Tricia isn't burdened by anything that came before. So her "most evil" ranking makes sense, and is seen in the way she kills without feeling. (Or perhaps her feeling annoyance at the victim.)

    I can't help but think Tricia's getting sloppy though. She's gone from meticulously picking people who aren't connected, to impatiently deciding Brenna will do, to haphazardly killing as she walks through a front door. (She didn't even try to do better than "Lynn Smith". ;) What if the woman had been on the phone, setting it aside to answer? Or there had been a baby sleeping upstairs? Okay, television, but what if she was a single mother watching it with a (boy)friend? Note I'm not saying Tricia's shift is bad or out of character, in fact it may be totally in character, showing her falling even deeper into the thrill of the kill versus careful premeditation. Just interesting.