tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6464382918796251124.post2622082872134900331..comments2021-05-16T13:41:12.015-04:00Comments on The Chaos Beast: Subject 13 #23 - CommentaryScott Delahunthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06735796666483741699noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6464382918796251124.post-11691181909652673082013-08-21T23:43:03.395-04:002013-08-21T23:43:03.395-04:00Some of the issues really didn't have much bac...Some of the issues really didn't have much backstory to them. ^_^;; With this feedback, the future commentaries for Lethal Ladies should be far better. :)<br /><br />Nasty's self esteem is a little battered. She's not used to being complimented; she had similar thoughts back at Seward in the early issues. So, getting positive feedback weirds her out, even on a mission.<br /><br />I worked out the mother-daughter relationship a bit more once I separated them. Nasty learned to cook out of necessity as a teen because of Maria's schedules. The father thing is indeed a bombshell, something Nasty doesn't talk about. Part of it is Maria being a single mother from child birth still has a stigma. The other part is that most people assume that everyone knows both parents, even if they split up for whatever reason. Anne made the assumption that Nasty knew both her parents. A later issue shows a solution.<br /><br />I didn't plan the call back to #6, but noticed what was happening when I posted here. It makes sense, though. Nasty wanted to be on her own; she's not getting her wish and finding out that it's not everything she thought it would be. I'm slowly improving; fortunately, I didn't need to aim for consistency. Thanks, though. The skirt is also representing her discomfort in the school; she doesn't quite fit in. (At home, she changes, and will be seen in a future Issue.)<br /><br />I couldn't keep them out for long. The news of a new Peregrine gave me an opportunity to add them back in. The lack of Peregrine on the streets isn't a big deal; Eagle himself is rarely on the streets.Scott Delahunthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06735796666483741699noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6464382918796251124.post-35875966760455908852013-08-20T20:37:57.934-04:002013-08-20T20:37:57.934-04:00I like this commentary much better than the last! ...I like this commentary much better than the last! Feels more behind the scenes, less restating the scenes.<br />"Nasty completely misread Ms Landry's attention": Actually, I felt like Nasty was just WAY off on the moon here. Because 1) Anne isn't really her mom, it doesn't seem like teacher talk jeopardizes the mission, so why the concern, esp when they're alone; 2) She already has it in her head that she's leaving at the end of the week, so she's mission-centred, thus again why the concern over something that has no impact in seven days; 3) If a teacher says "I was IMPRESSED", even IF you've screwed up everything previous to that, what in the tone would make her think impressively BAD? Persecution complex of self?<br /><br />I didn't expect the home ec reasoning though, that makes perfect sense in retrospect and adds to the scene, well done. The father thing is also a bit of a bombshell - I wonder, why does their cover story involve a father? Seems like it would make more sense to say there's a separation, or at least that he's always away on business. A sore point like that could cause problems.<br /><br />Very clever deke back to #6. DID you plan it, or did it just seem like a great idea, so you decided to write it in? The drawing isn't that terrible. It comes with time. And yeah, it was coming across a bit as the skirt (she even feels she needs to wear her jacket when at home??), so probably a good idea to show she likes them when they're longer.<br /><br />And hey, return of the "main" villains! Was glad to see that they were smart enough to check compatibility with Peregrine, given the robbery so close to where the minivan was. Of course, now that Nasty's out and about again at school, there's a greater chance that they'll stumble on her. (Also a greater chance that the Foundation can't call on Peregrine for more routine stuff, what will the press say when he's all "I have a sidekick!" and then they hardly see her for a week? Hmm.)Gregory Taylorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06547180132612659893noreply@blogger.com